Trusting is tough….do it anyway.

Recently we got to a point where in the timing of construction scheduling for our small cabin we got in contact with a favored friend who I have known for years. Allen and I had worked together off and on for about 10 years. He is a plumber and has done many projects not only for me but for family members and friends. He is from a Central American country and just as a point of reference I mention because he is/was a good friend and I trusted him. This is a recent happening, and to this point it hasn’t been resolved yet. He has gone missing and the money we gave him to purchase the materials he needed, and my last signed house plans are gone with him. Last contact with him he was going to Utah with a girlfriend for Easter and will call me when he returns…it’s been 10 days at this point. I have not given up hope yet….but….the clock is ticking on moving forward with our small project (you will one day see the end result) because of our dream heading to reality.

Avery, trust is something that sometimes take courage to step into. You will learn over the years of your life that with trust comes risk. People as individuals will exhibit traits that promote a sense of trust in them but you still have to be willing to be burned to walk in the no-mans land of trust. Of course there will always be “degree’s” of trust that are available to you. I trust your Grandma with my very life….there is nothing that she can do to create doubt within me short of disappearing completely much as Allen has just done. She has proven that she is trust worthy and it can take a lifetime to garner that kind of trust. I’ve been burned in about every way you can think of when it comes to whatever degree of trust I had given to various people over the years, their details are varied but for each I had placed my trust there by choice. Therefore I was willing to take the chance of being hurt, or disappointed, or deserted because when trust is honored it is a great feeling to see the reward for having given it.

So hey baby, let me give you a small guideline for your trust. I got into a small opinion conflict with a person years ago about the old adage to “trust no-one, till they earn your trust”. That is a “partial” truism, for me at least. I will lend trust just as I lend respect to everyone at the beginning of a relationship till “they” lose it. Now this is the “first” level of trust that is “given” to those you just meet either through a friendship or a work relationship. It is no elevated level of trust, just a casual minor thing like “showing up on time”, or “finishing what you started”, or “don’t repeat what I just told you” those levels of confidence. Overall I believe that there are four levels of trust whereby you live your life or pass through your life. I just mentioned the first level….the second is where Allen is/was. This is for friends who you have known for years and done things together, invited into your home, traveled together doing fun things and having survived and perhaps repeated. You can tell stories to these people, off colored jokes, use language that your mom (or me) might frown on (not really) but overall this level of trust is where you might be somewhat embarrassed with whatever is being revealed but not to the level of tears or great sadness. The third level is reserved to family and in particular your spouse (no rush). This level is where you can have your heart crushed, your spirit bruised because the knowledge is intimate and the hope is to have the kind of compassion you would expect from the one who’s trust to sympathize with either your situation or empathize with what you are experiencing lends hope to you in the sharing. Now the “particular” part of this trust level is with the one you marry and give your love/life/heart to. There is a real provision in this Nations law where a spouse can not be compelled to testify against their spouse no matter what they may or may not know about them. I know that sounds funny or counter intuitive but anything can happen and while innocence is assumed and guilt must be proven the connection to husband and wife is sacred given by God.

Level four…. “faith”;  ” belief and trust in and loyalty to God” is one definition of the word, faith and trust are often used together as a means to describe the importance of this fourth level of trust. Trust; : assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something, in this case Almighty God. The Bible tells you and me that it is impossible to please God without faith, (Hebrews 11:6) so in order to have that kind of faith…..you have to trust Him above all others.  See how that works? So….now what? What about Allen? I have decided to give him just a little more time to satisfy my trust in him before I place it with someone else to do what he was trusted to do. I’ll have to update you my love when the answer is revealed to me….for now, we wait.

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