Where do I begin?….

I wanted to wait a little while before adding to the love notes to you Avery. Just to see how things were going to go from the last time I reached out to you. What came from that waiting is sometimes life as it passes, hits you in the jaw as it goes by. Even at my experienced age I am often surprised at what can’t be planned for comes my way. We did get to see you last night for a brief visit here at the house. Aunt Heather was watching over you for the night as your folks were having a nice “time out” from parenting by spending the night up in Black Hawk out of town. Aunt Heather was coming over to get her dog (Buttercup) and some other things she needed then go to your house. You were quite distracted with things as you often are when you first get here. When it came time to go is was hugs and kisses and out the door. It was about 5* outside and I wanted to carry you out to the car (mainly to have just a brief moment to hug/carry you) and help Heather as her hands were full. You pitched a fit wanting to walk by yourself. It was then that the test of wills began, sorry my little love my will overrode yours…you wailed and squirmed till I plopped you into your car seat and closed the door without comment and back into the house. About a minute later the knock at the door brought me back to it and I saw Heather (and you) standing there. You had regret at how you had acted towards me and wanted to say sorry to me. Your hair was all over the place and evidence of tears on you cheeks told me that you had humbly (for a 4 yo) and contritely experienced regret. “Hey Baby” if you can maintain that humbleness of character, called meekness, you will become a tower of strength and people will be drawn to you wanting to be close. “Meekness” is not “weakness”….it is power under control and is rare for your generation, mine as well if truth be told. You wanted more hugs and kisses and once you got them you were on your way. So now…… why the cryptic header of this missive to you.

We have to go back two months….your Grandma was having a terrible headache one Sunday afternoon, it was December 20th 2020 and it was the third day of increasing pain so I took her to the ER. Two days later Grandma had already had immediate brain surgery to remove a golf ball size tumor. I believe it to be a life saving surgery but there was more. That Sunday evening when I went home and had to leave Grandma at the hospital we didn’t know what would come to light the next morning. When I returned a nurse greeted me once inside her room and went right into wanting to perform a needle biopsy to her lung. I was not getting what she was selling, “what do you mean the lung”? I was told that additional CTscans were done and revealed another tumor in her lung. Things had elevated that quickly. The brain surgery had not yet been done just hours away….I refused to let them do a needle biopsy out of concern that stabbing a tumor with a needle will leave a puncture that bad stuff can come out of into the body. They can use the tumor in Grandmas brain to test once removed….which they did. Fast forward to where we are now, your Grandma has completed one week of brain radiation where the tumor used to be and then two more weeks of radiation and Chemotherapy beginning the process of fighting the tumor in her lung a cancer. She has handled all of this with quiet internal strength that by the time you read this you will already be aware of. The continuing details of what is to come for us in the here and now can be told to you in the future by Grandma herself as the prognosis is good and she has stated more than once that she will be there for both Graduation and perhaps a wedding. I on the other hand have my doubts as to my own ability to be there for either event. I rest in the Lords hands as to how that turns out. When you end up reading this you will know then. These kinds of events that come more often than not there is no explanation as to the why and wherefore, we are left with where do you go. For your Grandma and me we turn to the source of our lives and hearts, Almighty God (who I call dad or daddy, abba Father). I do not know how people can go through even the smallest of issues without turning to our Creator, I never hesitate I don’t wonder if He is there or whether He exists. He has proven to me all of my life that I am not alone. Your Grandma is a stronger believer than I am and though there is some fear and apprehension (who wouldn’t have that) she rests in whatever the plan is for us both. I want to add this hey baby….we all die. Without exception, no one gets out alive (well, two did in the Bible Enoch and Elijah who will return at a specific point in time and will die then) even our Savior tasted death. If I remain I will explain to you what is in the offing for those who believe in God and His Son and those who don’t.

The bad things that we knew were coming as a result of the a visibly stolen election have come to light already. Former President Trump has left office and the new guy put in place. Biden is mentally only partially there, he is now merely a figure the Elite need to sign Executive Orders by the dozen trying to hamper or rescind all the good things Trump had done before. Remember this Avery….History is written by the victors…you can rest assured that this portion of History will be riff with lies and half-truths recorded for posterity with a different purpose in mind. I am a Conservative second and a Christian first, and with this transition of power at the highest levels people like Grandma and me (your mom as well) are already becoming a target for oppression and control. Take note that if things don’t get pushed back against by people like us it will be a very different Nation by the time you come into your own. I have been doing things trying to prepare for when it comes but have been on hold till we get Grandma on stable ground. Now that you have a brother on the way the urgency to have everything in place is even more important. We were told that he is going to be a “Chris Jr.”….I had hoped differently (love your dad just wanted something more imaginative), you of course will always be “hey baby” just as your mom has always been “little girl”. With repetition things are established that will last, so I will once again remind you that…. “anything you tolerate, you will always get more of”….

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